Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
