between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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