singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize