So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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