what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
In America we eat man semen.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
