Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
