This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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