how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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