Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
