If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
