For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
