and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
