I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
