i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Randomize
