You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
