we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
