hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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