any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
