Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
