then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
