What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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