There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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