I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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