eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
i need some magic done to my vagina
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
