is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
