There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
