It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
