What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize