Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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