Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
