Your mouth is God's brothel.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
