This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
