I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
