Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
