Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Randomize