dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Found the puke drawer
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
MIDGETS
????
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
