Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
