Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I still have a little drunk in my system
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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