the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
