sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
