You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
