well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
then he tried to convert me to islam
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize