just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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