Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
