I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
