drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
