If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
