your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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