Well apparently he's into motor boating.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
