you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
